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hanging with hybrids - summer camp
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<blockquote data-quote="HDRKID" data-source="post: 109487" data-attributes="member: 43"><p>OK, so my dad appears on board the spaceship and looks at me. “Hey, there are only a few days left of summer camp.”</p><p></p><p>"Thanks Dad, but how is Mom?"</p><p></p><p>“She’s fine, you need to start getting ready and packing up.”</p><p></p><p>I dreaded going back to human school more than facing the entire reptilian army. Pam, my girlfriend, brought two new warriors from Earth on board the spaceship. They were supposed to help us. The first warrior was an old lawyer that had just retired, and he wanted to bring some action into a boring life, because he was tired of going fishing, playing golf, and watching old TV shows on his wide screen. He was an expert on Erisa tax law, but he had never fired a gun – even once. Walter Goldfarggen was his name.</p><p></p><p>The second warrior was a skinny little teen age nerd who was the last person you would pick for a soccer game. He was so clumsy and bony that he reminded me of skeleton man. Also, he had all the charisma of dog poop. Eldon was his name.</p><p></p><p>Baby Sparrow giggled. "Yo Embryo, I know who your boyfriend is... WALDO THE BALDO!"</p><p></p><p>Embryo said, "I prefer Eldon, but he is kind of scrawny."</p><p></p><p>Pam said, "Please girls, be nice."</p><p></p><p>Embryo turned to the ugly nerd. “Hey human, you gotta girlfriend?” Before he could even attempt an answer… she added. “With your poor looks, it must be difficult!”</p><p></p><p>The human teen had dirty and greasy hair that was messy. His face sported lots of severe acne and an enormous HOOK nose. And, then to make matters worse, he had two gigantic elephantine radar ears.</p><p></p><p>Tall Tree glared at Embryo and made angry noises. She then turned to the lawyer. "I am sorry sir. People on board this ship respect warriors."</p><p></p><p>Mr. Goldfarggen nodded and said, "Thank you ma’am."</p><p></p><p>The lawyer glanced at me. "OK, so if I work here, I get a huge mansion. What about money?"</p><p></p><p>I sighed and said, "There ain’t none. However, you will get more stuff than an Earth billionaire even. The venari warriors do not lack in resources."</p><p></p><p>The old lawyer mulled it over. I could almost see in his head the turning of wheels and gears. Everything was all about money for this one. <em>Why did he even come</em>? He was bald on top, but he had a full beard and a ponytail. He had narrow eyes and featured big bushy brows and an enormous FAT pig nose. Rolls of fat made him look like a chubby teddy bear, but not in a good way. He was always complaining about his ex-wife and how much his divorce cost him – $47 million.</p><p></p><p>I asked pam. “Hey, are you sure we should bring Walter on? He has some tax troubles back on earth and is a wanted man. Like his law firm helped crooked politicians set up off shore bank accounts so they could cheat on taxes and that is wrong. The authorities might –“</p><p></p><p>Pam growled. “What we need are warriors. Don’t get in my way.”</p><p></p><p>Jimmy said. “Last time I checked, all politicians are crooks and the police state is pro rep. Human, wake up! They are our enemies.”</p><p></p><p>Pam gave both new warriors a ray gun. She explained that we warriors need always to be on alert as the rep army hits us hard and quickly leaves before we can re-organize. The lawyer insisted on people calling him Bob and acted as sweet as syrup. However, he sounded like corporate fake nice.</p><p></p><p>Jimmy sneered. "Human please, do you even know how to <em>FIRE</em> a ray gun?"</p><p></p><p>"That taint none of your dad burn bid ness," Bob responded.</p><p></p><p>Lone Wolf said, "I can help train you sir. Please come this way."</p><p></p><p>Funny, no one gave me any training – ever. I was just thrown right into the maw of war.</p><p></p><p>The next day Jimmy was training “Waldo the Baldo” into how to use a high power ray rifle to shoot down reps. It was tough going.</p><p></p><p>Jimmy said, “Damn your green! Ah no. LOOK! Like you hold it this way. Waldo The Baldo, you would know how to hold a damn rifle if you spent one day in a HUMAN army.”</p><p></p><p>Walter said, “Mr. Goldfarggen is my name. I don’t like your tone young man.”</p><p></p><p>Jimmy AKA Crude Dude shouted. “All right gold fart, your TRAINING is over!”</p><p></p><p>Crude Dude kicked a tiny chair in anger. He slammed the door as he exited the room.</p><p></p><p>The rest of us walked over to the cafeteria as we get hungry after doing morning exercises.</p><p></p><p>Eldon was all alone eating an ice cream pie. Fact is, he is always eating sugar. It is no wonder his face is full of bright red pimples and earth medicine could not clear up severe acne. He needs to lay off sweets for a bit and do more exercises. The girls had been teasing him with no mercy. He looked so sad like he was gonna cry. The troubled teen looked out the spaceship window, and his face filled with panic.</p><p></p><p>Embryo chimed in. "Hey, craven cripple… sadly, reps can smell a coward a mile away."</p><p></p><p>Eldon cleared his throat and said, “I’m a brave warrior.”</p><p></p><p>Baby Sparrow laughed. “Yeah right, I believe you.”</p><p></p><p>Jimmy added, "Frankly, weeee got no place for a pencil neck geek like you."</p><p></p><p>A loud boom shook all the tables in the cafeteria as we were under attack again. Right then the reps showed up. Eldon was cut down in one sec. Still, he held his ground, and that is a lot more than I can say for the lawyer. Waldo the Baldo ran away screaming in panic. He threw his ray gun at me. Then he paused out of breath, he started screaming again. The reps fired in the direction of the noise.</p><p></p><p>Lone Wolf and I dragged both men to the regeneration chamber in our regen room. However, there were already a lot of wounded warriors in our regen room. Most would spend hours inside, as they needed extensive repairs.</p><p></p><p>Pam was not just angry; she was a raving maniac. "GOLD FART, listen to me. Why did we bring you on board our ship? The fact is, we brought you on to help us. We did not bring you to mess us up. Right now you let the reps steal six boxes from the supply room - yes six! Those were critical components that are necessary. Also, you allowed the reps to damage our engine core."</p><p></p><p>Goldfarggen bowed his head in shame. "I'm sorry ma'am."</p><p></p><p>Pam threw her ray gun. It nearly hit the old lawyer, but he ducked just in time before it slammed into his arm. She glared at him, and there was fire in her eyes. She then kicked an empty wooden box, and it made a hollow noise.</p><p></p><p>She raved on. "Look at me….. you are not even a man. Who told you that you were a warrior, you stupid $#@^! If this happens again, I am sending your sorry ass back to earth - one way!"</p><p></p><p>Afterward, she turned her attention to Eldon who was shivering in panic. “Question, are you a man or a mouse?”</p><p></p><p>There was dead silence in the room. Pam was in a bad mood, and any chance of it changing was piss poor.</p><p></p><p>Jimmy said, "What we gotta do is kick out gold fag."</p><p></p><p>Lone Wolf nodded and said, "I agree, Jimmy."</p><p></p><p>Pam sighed. "I'm gonna give him one more chance - just one more."</p><p></p><p>"Ah maybe, I can go to Earth and recruit some more warriors," Jimmy asked.</p><p></p><p>Pam laughed bitterly. "Please, excuse my mirth - a <em>HUMAN</em> warrior. Human men are so weak, they make me wanna throw up!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="HDRKID, post: 109487, member: 43"] OK, so my dad appears on board the spaceship and looks at me. “Hey, there are only a few days left of summer camp.” "Thanks Dad, but how is Mom?" “She’s fine, you need to start getting ready and packing up.” I dreaded going back to human school more than facing the entire reptilian army. Pam, my girlfriend, brought two new warriors from Earth on board the spaceship. They were supposed to help us. The first warrior was an old lawyer that had just retired, and he wanted to bring some action into a boring life, because he was tired of going fishing, playing golf, and watching old TV shows on his wide screen. He was an expert on Erisa tax law, but he had never fired a gun – even once. Walter Goldfarggen was his name. The second warrior was a skinny little teen age nerd who was the last person you would pick for a soccer game. He was so clumsy and bony that he reminded me of skeleton man. Also, he had all the charisma of dog poop. Eldon was his name. Baby Sparrow giggled. "Yo Embryo, I know who your boyfriend is... WALDO THE BALDO!" Embryo said, "I prefer Eldon, but he is kind of scrawny." Pam said, "Please girls, be nice." Embryo turned to the ugly nerd. “Hey human, you gotta girlfriend?” Before he could even attempt an answer… she added. “With your poor looks, it must be difficult!” The human teen had dirty and greasy hair that was messy. His face sported lots of severe acne and an enormous HOOK nose. And, then to make matters worse, he had two gigantic elephantine radar ears. Tall Tree glared at Embryo and made angry noises. She then turned to the lawyer. "I am sorry sir. People on board this ship respect warriors." Mr. Goldfarggen nodded and said, "Thank you ma’am." The lawyer glanced at me. "OK, so if I work here, I get a huge mansion. What about money?" I sighed and said, "There ain’t none. However, you will get more stuff than an Earth billionaire even. The venari warriors do not lack in resources." The old lawyer mulled it over. I could almost see in his head the turning of wheels and gears. Everything was all about money for this one. [I]Why did he even come[/I]? He was bald on top, but he had a full beard and a ponytail. He had narrow eyes and featured big bushy brows and an enormous FAT pig nose. Rolls of fat made him look like a chubby teddy bear, but not in a good way. He was always complaining about his ex-wife and how much his divorce cost him – $47 million. I asked pam. “Hey, are you sure we should bring Walter on? He has some tax troubles back on earth and is a wanted man. Like his law firm helped crooked politicians set up off shore bank accounts so they could cheat on taxes and that is wrong. The authorities might –“ Pam growled. “What we need are warriors. Don’t get in my way.” Jimmy said. “Last time I checked, all politicians are crooks and the police state is pro rep. Human, wake up! They are our enemies.” Pam gave both new warriors a ray gun. She explained that we warriors need always to be on alert as the rep army hits us hard and quickly leaves before we can re-organize. The lawyer insisted on people calling him Bob and acted as sweet as syrup. However, he sounded like corporate fake nice. Jimmy sneered. "Human please, do you even know how to [I]FIRE[/I] a ray gun?" "That taint none of your dad burn bid ness," Bob responded. Lone Wolf said, "I can help train you sir. Please come this way." Funny, no one gave me any training – ever. I was just thrown right into the maw of war. The next day Jimmy was training “Waldo the Baldo” into how to use a high power ray rifle to shoot down reps. It was tough going. Jimmy said, “Damn your green! Ah no. LOOK! Like you hold it this way. Waldo The Baldo, you would know how to hold a damn rifle if you spent one day in a HUMAN army.” Walter said, “Mr. Goldfarggen is my name. I don’t like your tone young man.” Jimmy AKA Crude Dude shouted. “All right gold fart, your TRAINING is over!” Crude Dude kicked a tiny chair in anger. He slammed the door as he exited the room. The rest of us walked over to the cafeteria as we get hungry after doing morning exercises. Eldon was all alone eating an ice cream pie. Fact is, he is always eating sugar. It is no wonder his face is full of bright red pimples and earth medicine could not clear up severe acne. He needs to lay off sweets for a bit and do more exercises. The girls had been teasing him with no mercy. He looked so sad like he was gonna cry. The troubled teen looked out the spaceship window, and his face filled with panic. Embryo chimed in. "Hey, craven cripple… sadly, reps can smell a coward a mile away." Eldon cleared his throat and said, “I’m a brave warrior.” Baby Sparrow laughed. “Yeah right, I believe you.” Jimmy added, "Frankly, weeee got no place for a pencil neck geek like you." A loud boom shook all the tables in the cafeteria as we were under attack again. Right then the reps showed up. Eldon was cut down in one sec. Still, he held his ground, and that is a lot more than I can say for the lawyer. Waldo the Baldo ran away screaming in panic. He threw his ray gun at me. Then he paused out of breath, he started screaming again. The reps fired in the direction of the noise. Lone Wolf and I dragged both men to the regeneration chamber in our regen room. However, there were already a lot of wounded warriors in our regen room. Most would spend hours inside, as they needed extensive repairs. Pam was not just angry; she was a raving maniac. "GOLD FART, listen to me. Why did we bring you on board our ship? The fact is, we brought you on to help us. We did not bring you to mess us up. Right now you let the reps steal six boxes from the supply room - yes six! Those were critical components that are necessary. Also, you allowed the reps to damage our engine core." Goldfarggen bowed his head in shame. "I'm sorry ma'am." Pam threw her ray gun. It nearly hit the old lawyer, but he ducked just in time before it slammed into his arm. She glared at him, and there was fire in her eyes. She then kicked an empty wooden box, and it made a hollow noise. She raved on. "Look at me….. you are not even a man. Who told you that you were a warrior, you stupid $#@^! If this happens again, I am sending your sorry ass back to earth - one way!" Afterward, she turned her attention to Eldon who was shivering in panic. “Question, are you a man or a mouse?” There was dead silence in the room. Pam was in a bad mood, and any chance of it changing was piss poor. Jimmy said, "What we gotta do is kick out gold fag." Lone Wolf nodded and said, "I agree, Jimmy." Pam sighed. "I'm gonna give him one more chance - just one more." "Ah maybe, I can go to Earth and recruit some more warriors," Jimmy asked. Pam laughed bitterly. "Please, excuse my mirth - a [I]HUMAN[/I] warrior. Human men are so weak, they make me wanna throw up!" [/QUOTE]
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