I really wish it could be so easy .But it seems I've realise it so late that I have dug my own grave.Despite my better judgement, i'll bite.
I know what you're talking about, and it's normal really. Sh*t happens. I don't know about spells and such, but you must understand there are no quick fixes in life. Furthermore, one has to learn to deal with the consequences of his (or her, in your case)'s actions.
You don't wanna hear this (women and kids especially), but..
Actions have consequences.
I believe that I am indeed a testament to all who face what you face. I've faced adversity, and a bad record.. and past mistakes. My scores from HS would have you believe i'd be some burn out meth head who throws his life away. A look at my disciplinary record from school would have you believe that i'm a bad apple, that i'd end up in prison one day.
That was never the case, no one (except maybe God) knows the future. If my future (now my present) can be good, so too can yours.
Gotta be resilient, have to bounce back, keep rolling with the punches life throws at you. Face your problems head on, or the nightmare will never cease. The more you run from something, the more power you give it.
Starting over is possible, I've done it. It's not as easy as it sounds. Nor is it as romantic.
I'm an outlier, things turned up for me because of my (very unique I might add) personality. Most who start over end up in the freakin' gutter (literally, figuratively and metaphorically). Few people can do a complete reboot/restart and 'profit' (come out better than where they started)
It's actually harder on you to start over.. because you have to build yourself all the way back up to the point where you left off.. and then some.
Logically, just continuing on would put you in a better position in life. Not starting over. Requires less energy et cetera.
You believe running away from it all is your out, it's not. It just takes you deeper into the rabbit hole. Nothing is guaranteed in life. Escaping it all requires risk, and for many.. risk turns the tides and puts them in a better situation. For others, it ruins them.
It put me in a better situation, but only after constant struggle and fight. And I was lucky in life. Very lucky. My life shouldn't have turned out as well as it did. I'm the exception, not the rule. If 100 people like me did what I did and followed in my footsteps, copying my actions and ways... they wouldn't be nearly as well off (so to speak) as I am now.
They'd probably be dead or in jail, unemployed, on the verge of suicide and might actually go through with it.
Perhaps you're not as lucky as I am, perhaps your starting over will not end as well as it did for me.
Never make a leap if you aren't sure, if you want to take a run and jump across cliffs.. you better make DAMN sure you can make it. For if you are not 100% certain life will be good to you, then life will not be good to you. And you will not make it.
Don't know your situation, don't really care to tbh. But if you think about escaping, think twice. That is what I would've told myself prior to doing what I did once upon a time. Granted, I never looked back until now.
Life improved drastically for me when I left it all behind, but most end up in a long downward spiral which never ends for them.
Some might say the view is good from the top, but where IS the top? The grass is always greener on the other side.
You only get so many opportunities in life to start over, use them wisely.
There's my take, there's my unasked for advice. Take it or leave it, doesn't make a difference to me. Now i'm off to bed. Peace.
That's the problem Mayhem,India is way too different and ridiculous place for a woman to be born in here and I'm in a situation where I'm in deep trouble,i mean horrendous level of trouble and i get so irritated that with time I just haven't changed and continue to fall in trouble whereas there are my enemies,younger friends heck my own elder sister who's having everything for herself.I so badly remember how my in my childhood even though I was a unwise I got through my education,doing homework, playing and doing other crafty things and it was like a sweet dream and the moment I completed my 16 years it's like I was woken up with a sudden jerk though still I was able to ground myself down for a few years and get through my graduation somehow and even keep myself stable a few year after it.But I see how my luck hadn't helped me either and I can clearly see how it has been unfair to me compared to other women/successful female colleagues including my own sister.Tn was it on 13th street?
True what you said, though India is a lot different then the USA.
It may not be that easy.
And as result being a women in India I've been heavily humiliated and I myself feel ashamed of myself.I have been suicidal too but have backed out of forwardness and I seriously need some stability in my life.