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Funny predictions
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<blockquote data-quote="CaryP" data-source="post: 6172" data-attributes="member: 34"><p><strong>Funny predictions</strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Damn it Paul, does that mean I have to change my avitar? I just learned how to get the damned thing, and I'm pushing 24 hours of having it. Now you're telling me I only have 15 minutes? Leave it to the astute and ever observant Paul J. Lyon, Esq. to recognize the honorable southern gentleman, Jack Daniel.</p><p></p><p>My prediction:</p><p></p><p>Jack Daniel time travels to August 2004 just before the Nov. elections and makes prohibition of alcohol a major campaign issue. Kerry is all for it. Bush has fallen off the wagon and gone back to his old favorite, Jim Beam, as a "booster" to his anti-depressent medication. Mr. Bush vehemently opposes it. Mr. Daniel, outraged by the low brow brand chosen by the President, exposes the cheap, bas class, trailer trash alcoholic antics of the commander in chief. Mr. Daniel's is quoted to say, "If the prezident cain't drink a respectable brayand of bourbon, such as one named after myself, for which I am honored by as a southerner and a gentleman, then Ah say, let theya be no alcohol allowed in this great land of ours. Tis better to abstain, than to drink in pain." </p><p></p><p>Scandals of election fraud, and drunken free for alls in the White House involving Ashcroft, Rumsfeld, Cheney, and Bush with lap dances provided by Condi Rice, and Elaine Choi cause massive voter turn out. A third party candidate from the Libertarian party, Mr. Badnerik wins the election by wide margin. A drunken ex-president Bush refuses to give up the White House, making what will become the infamous "drunk speech from the oval office" on live TV. This causes the breakdown of government at all levels. Mayhem and anarchy erupt. Riots, disease and starvation kill half the population of the US in the four years following the 2004 elections. The rest of the world watches in amusement as the former "superpower" goes to the dogs. No help is asked for and none is offered. World opinion consolidates around "they finally got their due" and most are glad the U.S. would longer be able to practice its global imperialism. Bush and many of his administration are convicted of treason, and jailed for life, or deported to guard duty at the U.S. embassy in Baghdad.</p><p></p><p>When all seems lost, a small but visionary group, who had seen the future, comes to the rescue in 2008. The group known as the Time Travel Forum (.net, not .tk) is hailed as the new ruling elite with many of its members placed in postions of power. The group had solutions and answers to all manner of problems and conflicts. They had seen the future and analyzed and solved all significant problems in advance of their occurence. No one wanted to listen to their "doom and gloom" stories before the "breakdown" began, but now their wisdom was begged for by the surviving masses. </p><p></p><p>Mr. Daniel rescinds his call for prohibition, as one of the new laws of the land is that no cheap alcohol will be allowed. The TTF, as the group is called, establishes a state church, with the annointment of Pope Paul the first. One of Pope Paul's first proclimations is that Jack Daniel's bourbon will be the official church liquor, and will be used in all church cerimonies. Pope Paul is also appointed Atty. General for the new TTF government due to his former life as an attorney specializing in Constitutional law.</p><p></p><p>(More to come later. Feel free to add some of your own. Pick a position for yourself, whatever.) I'm keeping Mr. Daniel as my avitar, for now. He deserves more than 15 minutes.</p><p></p><p>Cary</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CaryP, post: 6172, member: 34"] [b]Funny predictions[/b] Damn it Paul, does that mean I have to change my avitar? I just learned how to get the damned thing, and I'm pushing 24 hours of having it. Now you're telling me I only have 15 minutes? Leave it to the astute and ever observant Paul J. Lyon, Esq. to recognize the honorable southern gentleman, Jack Daniel. My prediction: Jack Daniel time travels to August 2004 just before the Nov. elections and makes prohibition of alcohol a major campaign issue. Kerry is all for it. Bush has fallen off the wagon and gone back to his old favorite, Jim Beam, as a "booster" to his anti-depressent medication. Mr. Bush vehemently opposes it. Mr. Daniel, outraged by the low brow brand chosen by the President, exposes the cheap, bas class, trailer trash alcoholic antics of the commander in chief. Mr. Daniel's is quoted to say, "If the prezident cain't drink a respectable brayand of bourbon, such as one named after myself, for which I am honored by as a southerner and a gentleman, then Ah say, let theya be no alcohol allowed in this great land of ours. Tis better to abstain, than to drink in pain." Scandals of election fraud, and drunken free for alls in the White House involving Ashcroft, Rumsfeld, Cheney, and Bush with lap dances provided by Condi Rice, and Elaine Choi cause massive voter turn out. A third party candidate from the Libertarian party, Mr. Badnerik wins the election by wide margin. A drunken ex-president Bush refuses to give up the White House, making what will become the infamous "drunk speech from the oval office" on live TV. This causes the breakdown of government at all levels. Mayhem and anarchy erupt. Riots, disease and starvation kill half the population of the US in the four years following the 2004 elections. The rest of the world watches in amusement as the former "superpower" goes to the dogs. No help is asked for and none is offered. World opinion consolidates around "they finally got their due" and most are glad the U.S. would longer be able to practice its global imperialism. Bush and many of his administration are convicted of treason, and jailed for life, or deported to guard duty at the U.S. embassy in Baghdad. When all seems lost, a small but visionary group, who had seen the future, comes to the rescue in 2008. The group known as the Time Travel Forum (.net, not .tk) is hailed as the new ruling elite with many of its members placed in postions of power. The group had solutions and answers to all manner of problems and conflicts. They had seen the future and analyzed and solved all significant problems in advance of their occurence. No one wanted to listen to their "doom and gloom" stories before the "breakdown" began, but now their wisdom was begged for by the surviving masses. Mr. Daniel rescinds his call for prohibition, as one of the new laws of the land is that no cheap alcohol will be allowed. The TTF, as the group is called, establishes a state church, with the annointment of Pope Paul the first. One of Pope Paul's first proclimations is that Jack Daniel's bourbon will be the official church liquor, and will be used in all church cerimonies. Pope Paul is also appointed Atty. General for the new TTF government due to his former life as an attorney specializing in Constitutional law. (More to come later. Feel free to add some of your own. Pick a position for yourself, whatever.) I'm keeping Mr. Daniel as my avitar, for now. He deserves more than 15 minutes. Cary [/QUOTE]
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