I'll be straight here. Some of what you say makes sense, but a lot of it seems to be hyperbole. The stuff about your HS boyfriend makes sense. He was going to die, and by you telling him, changes the series of events. He's still going to die but in a different way now. Was his death inevitable? No, it just had a higher percentage chance of occurring due to other events you haven't linked. Perhaps they are past events prior to your wanting to tell him he's going to die, so there was nothing you could've done anyways. The stuff about God and Death and these other mythical or deity-type of figures are where the hyperbole comes in that sort of discredits the information that seems to have hints of truth to it. I'm not saying the God and Death parts aren't real to you, but in my reality they are only explanations for something larger we haven't been able to comprehend. Religion to me has an underlying truth behind all sects because all religions have eerily similar basis. That underlying truth is hidden in euphemism for ancient humans to better understand. The reason religions differ seemingly so vastly from one another is due to region and those humans interpreting things differently than humans on the other side of the world. I feel we've come to a point in technology that it's okay for us to dismiss religion completely and only look at scientific fact while retaining the message behind religion of being decent human beings to one another as we're all global citizens. We're smart enough to know for example the Bible is not fact and it's not real stories, but they exist for individuals that can't comprehend anything else, so they can live decent lives away from evils we experience even in society today. One interesting fact about Indian religion I found is that the reason there are so many gods with "absolute" power is because India is so large that they also suffer from the regional differences - so they can't have a blanket religion for one size fits all unless they have multiple gods. One person might love a particular god and say it's all mighty, and another person will love another god and say it's all mighty, but they are both part of the same religion still, so they are still unified yet they are given choices when it comes to their acceptance of religion. That's one reason I believe Hinduism to be a larger religious sect than say Christianity - because it appeals to more individuals. If I was raised to be Hindu, who knows... I might be religious. I was raised to be Christian, and it never stuck. I never could accept ambiguous truth. I would ask for explanations or answers and be given blanket statements that required unquestioning faith in order to accept - which isn't something I can do.Speaking only from experience without math to back it up- when my spirit fought to change a specific event-everything was in the event was predetermined, or I wouldn't know what was going to happen. And, in most cases, the event resisted changes, to the point that the ripple effect would reach out and touch my life.
For example, I blurted out to my HS boyfriend that he was going to die. When he asked how, my consciousness moved forward in time to show that if I told him it would be a football accident, then he would still die in another way, (car crash w/a drunken driver) only I would be there, too. Unable to tweak the event, I didn't tell him, because I wasn't ready to die, yet. But, I still felt terrible when he passed away a few months later.
A few years later, another boyfriend was cheating on me... and in despair, I asked God to show me who I was going to marry. God responded by filling me with love, warmth and what looked like sparkly stars. Then, He marked both my husbands in the same way when I first met them. However, I was having doubts about marrying my first husband, but I went through with it, because God had marked him. Does that mean God knew what I would choose (Determination) or did He actually choose for me?
And, the Grim Reaper (Death) once told me that our lives are like a vortex where we can start out making lots of decisions as kids, but eventually all our decisions would lead us down towards our demise and to him, so he could bring us through the bottom.
So, does that mean we don't feel like our decisions are pre-determined because like a rat in a cage we are incapable of determining what will happen to us, (getting fed, for example)? But, the person (reality or time itself?) feeding the rat in the cage knows when it's being done and can record everything the rat does within the cage, because it exists outside the boundries of the cage? Maybe, De ja vou is a primitive way of understanding our own pre-determined lives?
I mean, a few times my soul has been able to track people's lives from their past and forward to their demise sometimes when it entered a specific event that was happening.
I just don't know how everything adds up unless there is another force going on that we are not aware of a we live out our lives...
That being said, I believe reality to be a series of possible events. Everything exists simultaneously so every conceivable action has already occurred. We're simply just observers on a plane of existence relative to ourselves. Once we reach a higher level of knowledge we will see ourselves today as primitive beings. It's inevitable humans do not exist in the future; in the long ago past we weren't humans either; we were neanderthals, which is a different species earlier on in the evolutionary chain. Our distant ancestors will be aliens to us for they won't be humans but they would be humanoid, and highly intelligent with technology that would baffle us into perhaps believing they are gods. We are products of our environment and products of our time. We didn't exist in the past and we won't exist in the future; we only exist now.
A funny thing about humans is that most of us live in the past or the future; hardly any of us live in the today, the here, and now. We take advantage of our present and squander it with useless thought and emotion rather than actually living to our fullest potentials. However, this could be human nature as it's often difficult to gauge oneself therefore difficult to assess realities of situations. Hindsight is also 20/20 which makes it easier to reflect on the past than predict the future. We're also curious entities that are never fully satisfied which is an evolutionary trait to drive us forward. That's one reason Utopia's can't exist: because there would be no reason to evolve after that, which would only contribute to DE-evolution; which... is possible once you remove the factors that drive you forward.