Happiness

[CaryP]

Happiness

Some dictionary definitins first from Merriam Webster online.


Main Entry: hap?pi?ness
Pronunciation: 'ha-pi-n&s
Function: noun
1 obsolete : good fortune : PROSPERITY
2 a : a state of well-being and contentment : JOY b : a pleasurable or satisfying experience
3 : FELICITY, APTNESS

Thesaurus

Entry Word: happiness
Function: noun
Text: a state of well-being or pleasurable satisfaction <felt happiness at her husband's success>
Synonyms beatitude, blessedness, bliss, blissfulness
Related Word content, contentedness, satisfaction; cheer, cheerfulness, felicity, gladness; gaiety, jollity, joy; delectation, delight, enjoyment, pleasure
Contrasted Words discontent, dissatisfaction, vexation; cheerlessness, despair, desperation, despondency, hopelessness; distress, misery, wretchedness
Antonyms unhappiness

New word.

Main Entry: sat?is?fac?tion
Pronunciation: "sa-t&s-'fak-sh&n
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Middle French, from Late Latin satisfaction-, satisfactio, from Latin, reparation, amends, from satisfacere to satisfy
1 a : the payment through penance of the temporal punishment incurred by a sin b : reparation for sin that meets the demands of divine justice
2 a : fulfillment of a need or want b : the quality or state of being satisfied : CONTENTMENT c : a source or means of enjoyment : GRATIFICATION
3 a : compensation for a loss or injury : ATONEMENT, RESTITUTION b : the discharge of a legal obligation or claim c : VINDICATION
4 : convinced assurance or certainty <proved to the satisfaction of the court>

No matches in Thesaurus for "satisfaction"

Not trying to beat a dead horse here, but I still say that "happiness" is a fleeting emotion that comes and goes, and is very over-rated by the masses for the most part. The happiness that most people speak about is really the "satisfaction" of accomplishment and fulfillment, my "enough action" equation. Problem for the masses is they're out looking for another fix of "happiness" and are totally clueless as to what would satisfy them. They wouldn't know satisfaction/happiness if it jumped up and bit them on the ass. They never take the time to reflect on what it would take to satisfy them, and then take appropriate action to produce these results. My contention is that the pursuit of satisfaction, with clearly declared standards in advance, will lead to more experiences of "happiness." People pursuing clear standards of satisfaction are happier, than those wandering through life looking for "what's next" nagged by the question "is this all there is, is this it?". We Americans are particularly addicted to the "happiness" thing. It's in our founding declaration of the right to "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness". So we have a bunch of mostly clueless knuckleheads out there pursuing "happiness", who get to be victims when it's never found. Happiness is not something to be found or pursued. It is an experience that comes and goes transiently with our pursuit of life's accomlishments or the lack thereof.

The victimhood of pursuing the all elusive happiness is the slavery Cyberbomb writes about. Reading his post about becoming a slave to happiness or its pursuit, sounded an awful lot like addiction to me. Can't get it enough, always looking for more, etc. This is also a classic case of a lack of undeclared standards of satisfaction. Happiness is not a material, like a tree or a rock. It's a human emotion. Emotions by their nature are short lived and transient. The best way to get unhappy is to try to hang on to being happy once the moment has passed. You want happy? Work on getting satisfied. This takes thought and work. But how many people do you know who are consistently satisfied and "happy" with accomplishing nothing , pursuing no future outcome or different results (exception for vacations, time off, R&R of course - and even that is an accomplishment for some). "Gee honey, I had a really satisfying year of being a slug." Doesn't make sense. Our dignity and self-esteem come from the work we do and the accomplishments we attain (family, career, personal health, hobbies, etc.)

I'll shut up here. Sorry if I went on too long.

Cary

 

[StarLord]

Happiness

Cary,

I have learned that if I base my happiness upon my fleeting emotional states I am slave to my emotions regarding the quantity and quality of my happiness.

However, by realizing that happiness is a state of mind, of itself, free from my mental requirements and self imposed fences, I have just freed my happiness and the only dues that I have to pay are the ones I spent to get me to that particular viewpoint.

We live in a realm of duality here. The Dark side will always be here along with it's counterpart Light. Life/death, Beeauty/uglyness, Hot/cold, what ever, each has it's place connected to it's other proper half. The secret is attention and perception. If you don't like what you see from one aspect or viewpoint, move around because there are 359 other lily pads on the great pond of life from which to look from.

 

[Grayson]

Happiness

Originally posted by StarLord@Jul 31 2004, 08:30 PM
Cary,

I have learned that if I base my happiness upon my fleeting emotional states I am slave to my emotions regarding the quantity and quality of my happiness.

However, by realizing that happiness is a state of mind, of itself, free from my mental requirements and self imposed fences, I have just freed my happiness and the only dues that I have to pay are the ones I spent to get me to that particular viewpoint.

We live in a realm of duality here. The Dark side will always be here along with it's counterpart Light. Life/death, Beeauty/uglyness, Hot/cold, what ever, each has it's place connected to it's other proper half. The secret is attention and perception. If you don't like what you see from one aspect or viewpoint, move around because there are 359 other lily pads on the great pond of life from which to look from.

​

Wisdom indeed. I tried to say that, but I'm not as bright as you... apparently. :lol:

 

[CaryP]

Happiness

Starlord,

I don't base my happiness on fleeting emotions. I could give a rat's ass about my happiness. Happiness is not something I pursue. At the same time, I found that when I gave up the "have to be happy" thing, I became a lot happier. The point of all my slobbering over this thread is that happiness is elusive and transitory, and is not attainable if pursued. I'd rather focus on what I can accomplish with my family, health, business, community, etc. You're either a contribution or a drag on those around you. I tend to opt for contribution, even if it means I have to do the damned dishes. I hate doing the damned dishes, but gives my wife and daughter immense pleasure when I do, which is farily oftern. That results in a lot more "happiness" for me - as in satisfactin of accomplishment and contribution. Maybe I'm not being clear or we have a US / Britain disconnect. I think we're saying the same thing, just out of different perspectives. Being American of the old school, I tend to see things from a "results not reasons" perspective. You either have desired results or reasons why not. The reasons part sucks. That doesn't mean that failing to achieve desired results falls into reasons why not, but more like "what am I missing here" and "who can I call on in my network of support to help me navigate out of my current breakdown/problem" rather than "it's all for naught, why did I even try" victim mentality. I agree that there are always almost unlimited perspectives not seen when adopting one perspective. But to just to jump to one that justifies/placates the current circumstance sounds somewhat defeatist from my perspective. Never give up, never say die, if that's what you're committed to. IMO, that's what's missing from the current American malaise and victimhood, which grows by the day. And, yes, I probably sound like an American capitalist pig. Don't give a rat's ass about that either. It's becoming more and more a "dog eat dog" world. Are you going to eat or be eaten? I plan on being full at meal time. I tried the "starving artiste" thing. Didn't really care for it. Poverty sucks. Money can't buy you happines, but it damned sure doesn't buy you poverty. I'm not making any assessments of your current personal financial situation, just speaking out of my own experience. We can sit around in some cosmic interpretation of life and be "happy" with that, but it don't pay the freakin' rent. My interpretation is we're here to learn and contribute. Like it or not, it's really hard to contribute to others if you're dead broke, but happy. I'm not saying that financial accomplishment is the be all, end all. IMO contribution to others and a keen sense of accomplishment are pretty close to the mark.

I'll shut up before this gets too long. Thanks for your perspective.

Cary

 

[Cyberbomb]

Happiness

Heh, thx Grayson, lets see if I can bring it to the point better this time.

You said in your first post "I have learned one thing from my recent experience. Happiness is essential to life." Experiences are funny as they tend to cancel each other out sometimes and make it seem like there is no "right" answer if you have walked "on both sides of the road".

Im going to use an example of someone insulting another, because it seems like it is one of the greatest problems going around in this day and age.

When someone is insulted, there are many ways someone can react, the most common is the other person gets angry because the insult may have hurt their pride in some way or something along those lines. This person gains a constant but ultimatly insignificant happiness feeling from that pride, and that person wants his happiness back, he can't stand being without it, so he insults the person back and this goes back and forth until another event happens (fight is the most common).

Not only do these people become unstable from the rush of emotions, but also dangerous because once a person lets their emotions get so out of control they can't stop, even if they want to, that invisable force drives them further and further telling that person what to do, and because he is so dependent on these forces he will follow them to the end even if a part of this poor person wants to turn back.

This is undenyable, almost every person in this world can relate to this in a simular situation, people who don't follow emotions yet and just live in the world ( babies) are mostly the only exemption.

Now there is more to this example then the meaning of the cause and the result, lets look closer at what would happen in this situation. When these people have argued and will not allow their pride to be pushed aside and their happiness diminished, anger over flows and they will fight, but wait... whats this?! many transformations have happened, do you know what they are?! Happiness is spread out and expressed through other emotions, part of happiness turns to pride, and then that pride is turned to resent, then anger, then when all is said and done, the winner gains more happiness, and the loser becomes depressed that he was owned by that rat bastard, who walks high with his greater pride.

(If I am going to make any mistakes in what I am saying, its going to be below this line)

Happiness became all of these emotions, it became resentment, anger, and other dangerous forces. There is something wrong with this already, anger, resentment, arn't these all those evil emotions that everyone is screaming "nazi" about and saying that they are so wrong and immoral and all of this other wrong things that these completely ignorent, pityful, and utterly stupid people who are now STARTING TO EXPRESS THESE EMOTIONS THEMSELVES WHICH THEY COMDEMN UPON OTHER PEOPLE AND TRY TO MAKE THEM FEEL WRONG AN... erm, yeah, anyways, so would I be wrong if I said that happiness, anger, and resentment are one and the same, just expressing itself differently?! But for some reason you believe now because of something that happiness is essential to life? And would I also be wrong if I were to say that happiness is the same as all other emotion, even the lowest, most resented ones, the ones everyone else accuses others of being while they act the same themselves and are no better if not worse?(unhappiness is a lack of happiness so don't you dare think of using it as a counter for that statement , as it is not the same as happiness)

Now that im done with that part of the half example/half rant, its time to look at a way without happiness.

Say the same situation happens, someone insults the other, but the insulted doesn't respond with pride, but instead just responds by saying that person is wrong, instead of a counter insult, because there is no need or desire to use one without that invisable master guiding him. Now not only is the person not able to respond with anything sensible, but he has also lost part of his pride, even tho what he is saying is a lie just to make the person is angry, just saying that he is wrong feels wrong for no reason, he will continue to insult just for the sake of it, but ultimately has already lost.

Since it is late I need to end this message where it is right now, but as I see happiness is a third person, and that people have to stop listening and working with it, we were born with it but never asked for it, it was just always there, endlessly wasting our time and bending our ideals towards its favor while claiming its better then all others yet is the same and no better.

 

[CaryP]

Happiness

Okay, one more time for all you Brits (Starlord, you sound British, and I know Grayson is, Cyber I believe you're American, but what the hell). A good friend of mine has recently written a book. I haven't read it (planning to), but it comes out of some training/education we both went through. He was a student in a couple of courses I taught on the subject, and I helped him a little in transitioning his consulting practice to the discipline of Ontology of Language. He decided to make a career out of it as a corporate consultant. He was already doing that from his Arthur Anderson days (now Accenture) and the whole TQM movement that swept through corporate America back in the 1990's. He found this education to be a much more effective way of helping companies and individuals in their endeavours (I even spelled that like a Brit in honor of you guys). His book "Language and the Pursuit of Happiness" can be found at Chalmers Brothers & Assoc. No, you don't have to buy the book, but there are parts of the book you can read on the site by clicking on the "Preview and Purchase My New Book" button. I saw that Julio Olalla wrote the forward for the book. You probably don't know who Julio Olalla is, but he's one of the pre-eminent coaches/teachers of the Ontology of Language out there today. Check it out, if you're up to it, and let me know what you think. If you find the reviewable parts interesting, you might consider buying the book. I would think you'd find it fascinating, or at least very entertaining.

Yeeha,

Cary

 

[Ralan]

Happiness

\"Language and the Pursuit of Happiness\"

Wow, that's my favourite subject and sole spreadable mission combined in one book (one book title?). It should be mine.

 

[HackimerRob]

Happiness

It's a little too textbookey for me. But this guy? His name is really CHALMERS BROTHERS? Sounds like a comedy duo, or a smalltown insurance agency or real estate agents. I had a good laugh at this mans expense, and he doesn't even know it. Hey Cary, do me a solid bro? Let him know I laughed at his name and then tell him I'm sorry he has that name.
Unless he likes it. Then tell him it is a nice name. a wonderfully nice name. (someone pet me on the head).

 

[CaryP]

Happiness

Originally posted by Hackimer@ Rob,Aug 10 2004, 04:20 PM
It's a little too textbookey for me. But this guy? His name is really CHALMERS BROTHERS? Sounds like a comedy duo, or a smalltown insurance agency or real estate agents. I had a good laugh at this mans expense, and he doesn't even know it. Hey Cary, do me a solid bro? Let him know I laughed at his name and then tell him I'm sorry he has that name.
Unless he likes it. Then tell him it is a nice name. a wonderfully nice name. (someone pet me on the head).

​

Hack,

I'd pat you on the head, but what would people say. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I have a real jester hat, that I got in Scotland. PM me your mailing address and I'll send it to you with my compliments. You're certainly deserving of a crown for your new found role here.

You can be one cruel mofo there bub. Yes, that's his name, "Chalmers Brothers." It's southern, and I'm sure he's very proud of his name. He is one hell of a cool guy, and you'd be priviledged to meet him. I'd tell you his wife's name, but you'd probably make fun of that too. She goes by Dr. Brothers professionally, and no her first name is not "Joyce". I won't be a participant in your cruel hoax on my good friend or his name. Why don't you email him and tell him I gave you his site as reference to the book? Then you can insult his name all you want. He might just laugh his ass off once he found out you were from Neeww Yooorrk Ciiittyy (drawn out southern twang) and that you bought a duck. Don't take this as any offense on my part. I actually laughed a bit. Feigned indignation is a southern tradition.

Why you scaliwag! You swine! You carpet bagger! Yooouuuu Yankee! You suh, have no honor, and I hear that you won't be received by polite society in your own hometown. I hear that members of your own family will have nothing to do with you! Ohhh, the outrage! The scandal! The utter tragedy of it all! (A fair maiden swoons in the background due to the "vapors.") QUICK! Get some smelling salts, an innocent could not bear this charlatan's presence!

Was that feigned enough? I feel that my honor has been satisfied.

Cary

P.S. I'm serious about the jester hat. It's really cool, multiple colors, bells, and all. I used to put it on the head of different staff members briefly when they'd screw up in a small way. I wore myself a couple of times. Big screw ups....well you don't want to know how those ended.

 

[gomp]

Re: Happiness

Happiness can almost always be found in the bottom of a bottle of cheep gin
chug-a-lug