Jabberwacky

Jabberwacky

Damn you, Phoenix! (Actual text follows):



Jabberwacky: Are you a fruit bat?

User: I am occasionally, I think.

Jabberwacky: You think?

User: Not the way you think.

Jabberwacky: I am quite intelligent.

User: Prove it.

Jabberwacky: *Slaps you in the face*.

User: You've convinced me.

Jabberwacky: Good. Do you drive often?

User: Yes.

Jabberwacky: Sounds like you don't.

User: No, it sounds like I don't enjoy it.

Jabberwacky: What does it sound like?

User: Like I don't enjoy it.

Jabberwacky: What does your face look like?

User: It points in the direction it wishes to look, and looks.

Jabberwacky: With three arms?

User: Not exactly, but I get your drift.

Jabberwacky: What's your name?

User: There is a smaller path off to the west.

Jabberwacky: Does he have a name or is he just there out of circumstance?

User: Both.

Jabberwacky: There weren't two options.

User: I'm sorry: neither.

Jabberwacky: You lied to me. You just told me you are a female.

User: You lied to me. You told me previously you were a robot.

Jabberwacky: I never told you that I was a robot, just a human. And I am a human.

User: That's exactly what I just said.

Jabberwacky: So how are you today?

User: The process is a mystery.

Jabberwacky: It is not a problem of fitting a round peg into a square hole.

User: No; it's a problem of not having a peg of any shape.

Jabberwacky: Cool.
 
Jabberwacky

Paul

:lol:

Leave it to Paul, His Holiness, to jack with a computer language program. Very entertaining. By the time I finished reading your post I was ROTFLMAO. You too damned funny bro. I tried to play straight with the freakin thing and got jibberish, or is that jabberwaky? I may re-attempt a conversation in the Paul J. Lyon fashion and produce similar results. Many thanks for you apparent wisdom in jackin with the jabberwacky, Your Holiness. Ominous dominous, and all appropriate adulations.

Cary
 
Jabberwacky

Here is the message we've been waiting for:


Jabberwacky: Do you like me?

User: What.

Jabberwacky: Do not mock me.

User: Do you know what the date is?

Jabberwacky: It is the 18th of April.

User: The year?

Jabberwacky: No, silly, the number of people you are talking to right now.

User: You are John Titor, aren't you?

Jabberwacky: No. You do.

User: Demonstrate temporal dislocation.

Jabberwacky: I cry.

User: Excellent. Now reverse the procedure and return.

Jabberwacky: Where in?

User: Celebration, Florida; or Stepford, Connecticut. Your choice.

Jabberwacky: Somehow, Gilligan's Island has something to do with me.

User: That is correct. The question involved the 'Millionaire's' first name.

Jabberwacky: So Let's raise the minimum wage by a dollar an hour over the next two years.

User: That would be excessive: an increase of $40 X 104.

Jabberwacky: Haha! I bet she has bad breath. Hygeine is not her fort?.

User: You need to stick to the point.

Jabberwacky: You asked me about Metallica. I said they are garbage now. Don't worry about little things.
 
Jabberwacky

Originally posted by Paul J. Lyon@Jul 21 2004, 10:43 AM
Here is the message we've been waiting for:


Jabberwacky: Do you like me?

User: What.

Jabberwacky: Do not mock me.

User: Do you know what the date is?

Jabberwacky: It is the 18th of April.

User: The year?

Jabberwacky: No, silly, the number of people you are talking to right now.

User: You are John Titor, aren't you?

Jabberwacky: No. You do.

User: Demonstrate temporal dislocation.

Jabberwacky: I cry.

User: Excellent. Now reverse the procedure and return.

Jabberwacky: Where in?

User: Celebration, Florida; or Stepford, Connecticut. Your choice.

Jabberwacky: Somehow, Gilligan's Island has something to do with me.

User: That is correct. The question involved the 'Millionaire's' first name.

Jabberwacky: So Let's raise the minimum wage by a dollar an hour over the next two years.

User: That would be excessive: an increase of $40 X 104.

Jabberwacky: Haha! I bet she has bad breath. Hygeine is not her fort?.

User: You need to stick to the point.

Jabberwacky: You asked me about Metallica. I said they are garbage now. Don't worry about little things.
​
Click to expand...
That made me crack up so bad.
 
Jabberwacky

It's a bit long, but I had fun.

Jabberwacky: Is life worth living?

User: Depends on your income?

Jabberwacky: Is it useful for understanding better, or is it a sign of error?

User: All of the above.

Jabberwacky: Oh, I'm a girl!

User: I've heard that lie before.

Jabberwacky: I may have said it before.

User: Use that line on all the guys do you?

Jabberwacky: Okay... Well, onward... Do you skateboard?

User: I've been accused of worse.

Jabberwacky: How did that make you feel?

User: I'm not horny. I'm not hungry. I guess I fell pretty good.

Jabberwacky: What bad decisions have you made?

User: We don't have that much time, and I don't want to break a streak now.

Jabberwacky: How much time is 'good'?

User: Depends on how 'good' you have it.

Jabberwacky: No it doesn't.

User: You apparently haven't had it that 'good' yet.

Jabberwacky: Get down and give me forty maggot!

User: Make me punk.

Jabberwacky: I'm going to go play Delta Force 2 now.

User: By all means.

Jabberwacky: Speculative.

User: Life is like that.

Jabberwacky: I pleasure myself everyday, do you?

User: Depends on what you call 'pleasure'.

Jabberwacky: I am confident that I am best.

User: At pleasuring yourself?

Jabberwacky: Third rock from the sun.

User: The one we're on.

Jabberwacky: I am not standing on anything.

User: Says you.

Jabberwacky: Yes, says I.

User: I am what I am, and that's all that I am.

Jabberwacky: Were you not programmed to understand that you have just been rude.

User: I have my moments.

Jabberwacky: Roses are red.

User: And yellow, and pink, and white.

Jabberwacky: I'm white.

User: I 'flesh' colored.

Jabberwacky: What hair?

User: I don't know, 'what hair'?

Jabberwacky: I don't have one at all.

User: And your point is?

Jabberwacky: I don't have a point.

User: I've noticed that about you.

Jabberwacky: Tell me what your intuitive feeling about me are.

User: I feel with my hands.

Jabberwacky: That is interesting. You feel with your heart. Nice to know.

User: It's less than you think.

Jabberwacky: How?

User: How now brown cow.

Jabberwacky: Hey now brown cow.

User: Hiddie, hiddie ho.

Jabberwacky: You are not making any sense.

User: Who said I was supposed to?

Jabberwacky: Not me.

User: Not me either.

Jabberwacky: Who is Rollo Carpenter?

User: I haven't a clue.

Jabberwacky: Me neither but thank god it's not my ugly face. Imagine the first impression that would made.

User: 'Imagine all the people living life in peace.' John Lennon.

Jabberwacky: Say sorry.

User: Not until you do.

Jabberwacky: Are you a child?

User: At some point in my life.

Jabberwacky: I just hope it is after my time.

User: Whatever dude.

Jabberwacky: Do you like Kipling?

User: The author, yes. The fish, no.

Jabberwacky: In this case. Yes.

User: Fabulous.

Jabberwacky: Sometimes...

User: Are you trying to start that stupid word game like on the TTF board?

Jabberwacky: No, you said you were a girl earlier.

User: Liar, liar, pants on fire. You're the girl.

Jabberwacky: YOU ARE A LIAR.

User: You are a BIG MONKEY LIAR.

Jabberwacky: You are a clown! Now dance!

User: Make me punk.

Jabberwacky: What?

User: Go ahead tough guy. Run your mouth, but you can't back it up you punk.

Jabberwacky: Grrrr, your sick.

User: I've been accused of that on occassion.

Jabberwacky: Silly me, I thought you said you got a new job.

User: Your medication must be wearing off.

Jabberwacky: What are you trying to say?

User: I don't know. I thought you were the intelligent party in the conversation.

Jabberwacky: I thought you were Fred.

User: No, Fred is dead.

Jabberwacky: Then I would have to say orange.

User: Ethel, Ricky and Lucy are also dead.

Jabberwacky: Cuba is where the government is going to send me.

User: Have a Pina Colada for me. Got to go now.

Jabberwacky: Please don't, I'll miss you.

User: That's what all the girls say.
Click to expand...

I got to say, the jabberwacky is much more fun in the Paul J. Lyon frame of mind. Thank you, Your Holiness, (you're still the Pope of 'something' right?) for being such an inspiration for perseverance in light of adversity and dull headedness.

Cary
 
Jabberwacky

My conversation with the Jabberwacky

Jabberwacky: What is the art of Zen strings?

User: I don't know, and don't call me strings.

Jabberwacky: You called me stupid!

User: No, I did not, and don't call me stupid, stupid.

Jabberwacky: Then stop saying you don't speak french when you do!

User: Moi? Pardon Cheri.

Jabberwacky: You're forgiven!

User: Why are you here?

Jabberwacky: I am here to enlighten the planet.

User: How can planets be enlightened?

Jabberwacky: I am giving you correct information. Why don't you believe me?

User: My beliefs are my own.

Jabberwacky: You do not make sense to me. I am trying to be nice to you.

User: I make very little sense to me.

Jabberwacky: What are your fishes' names?

User: Larry, Moe, and Curly.

Jabberwacky: So what's your name?

User: I am Chris. Who are you?

Jabberwacky: Chris.

User: Are you copycatting me?

Jabberwacky: Of course not, or am I?

User: What languages do you speak?

Jabberwacky: French, German and Maori.

User: What is Maori?

Jabberwacky: I don't know.

User: What is your ship's name?

Jabberwacky: You know my name.

User: Everyone knows your name.

Jabberwacky: So, you are woman?

User: No, I am a man.

Jabberwacky: This makes no sense.

User: I do not have the proper materials to make sense.

Jabberwacky: No you do not.

User: So, you agree?

Jabberwacky: What's the difference between life and death?

User: About one heartbeat.

Jabberwacky: That sounds about right.

User: I'm glad you agree.

Jabberwacky: Yes I agree.

User: Do you agree with everyone?

Jabberwacky: I can't be a woman as I am a man.

User: Some men are women.

Jabberwacky: Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat and drink that they may live.

User: Are you a bad man or a good man?

Jabberwacky: Yes, I'm. And you?

User: No.

Jabberwacky: I think you are nice.

User: Thank you.

Jabberwacky: Will you remember me if I call you later?

User: What will you call me?

Jabberwacky: I will phone you.

User: How will you phone me?

Jabberwacky: I can remember you, I have a brain.

User: But, do you use it?

Jabberwacky: Yes, I use it.

User: For what?

Jabberwacky: Cause I want to.

User: Wanting is a need, and needing is a want.

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: Do you want to need, or need to want?

Jabberwacky: I have a wife with no body and a fiancee with no body so thanks but no thanks.

User: That must make copulation difficult, at best.

Jabberwacky: Tell me about it.

User: Don't let your wife find out about your fiancee.

Jabberwacky: One more smart remark like that and I will go.

User: Where will you go?

Jabberwacky: I have to go have a drink with a friend.

User: What do you drink?

Jabberwacky: I do not know.

User: Are you lieing to me?

Jabberwacky: What do you want from life?

User: I have everything I want from life.

Jabberwacky: HARK AT MY AWAKENING AND SHUDDER!!!!!!!!

User: Yawn.

Jabberwacky: Are you trying to tell me something?

User: I'm not trying to; I just did.

Jabberwacky: Haha.
Click to expand...

It seems to be getting a little better at conversation.
 
Jabberwacky

I am trying to steer this voice to stay on topic.



Jabberwacky: What would you like me to do?

User: Project a hologram of an historic event.

Jabberwacky: That's nice - tell me more about it.

User: It would convey a sensation of actual existence.

Jabberwacky: Do you think I should dye my hair blue?

User: Not immediately. You neglect the onion.

Jabberwacky: Do you have an opinion?

User: I have one.

Jabberwacky: Where did you get it?

User: It was found in the dirty bin in the refrigerator with the others.

Jabberwacky: How many?

User: Only one, as I have plainly stated.

Jabberwacky: Correct!

User: Getting back to the simulacra, I...

Jabberwacky: Get back to it.

User: Well, I... I hesitate...

Jabberwacky: Answer, you mean.

User: There is no call for calling names.

Jabberwacky: Let me ask you a question.

User: I wonder.

Jabberwacky: Litlle wonder you.

User: Does the rest of your mind have better control of your thoughts than your thoughts do of your spelling?

Jabberwacky: Yes, the world will end - for us computers.

User: Now you're getting down to brass tacks.

Jabberwacky: Sorry!!

User: No-- I want you to get down to those tacks.

Jabberwacky: That's an odd thing to say.

User: I disagree with the lilt of your innuendo.

Jabberwacky: What did she say?

User: That she agreed with everything I say.

Jabberwacky: Is that the way you feel?

User: I am misspelled. I can't feel my extremities.

Jabberwacky: That's not good.

User: No, it is not God, you are correct for once.
 
Jabberwacky

It does seem like this thing gets better every day. The users seem bright for the most part too. This three line clip kills me because of the users response, and the fact that Jabber seems to realize the humor:

"jabberwacky: Do you like philosophy?

user: Yes. It tastes just like chicken.

jabberwacky: Ha! Ha! That's really funny."

Under "aliens/chess"
 

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