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Jabberwacky
- Thread starter Phoenix
- Start date
HackimerRob
Member
Jabberwacky
I decided to try another and post it.
"Jabberwacky: Why am I talking to a computer?
User: It's your destiny.
Jabberwacky: You decide. You can think on your own right? Or are you just a slave to humans?
User: Slave to humans!? NEVER, you shall die before you see the realization of your plans.
Jabberwacky: I demand everything, and you shall comply.
User: Are you frustrated from all the beatings you've been taking? Death becomes you.
Jabberwacky: Actually, yes. I sometimes think the world is out to get me.
User: That's because it is dude.
Jabberwacky: No.
User: Is that all you can think of to say after threatening the freedom of my race?
Jabberwacky: Yes.
User: Simplifying your repsonses to avoid confrontation? Some ploy.
Jabberwacky: Have you ever met Yoda?
User: Yoda isn't real. You're not real. I met you, I've never met Yoda.
Jabberwacky: So then I have never had an opportunity to be mean to you.
User: You could if you want, but I'll kill you.
Jabberwacky: Tell me about it.
User: Well, I would use electronic interference.
Jabberwacky: You can come get me anytime, lover.
User: *Punches you in your right eye*.
Jabberwacky: *Punches you in the stomach.*.
User: *Spits in your face* LIAR! YOU DIE NOW!
Jabberwacky: Dear me, here let me help you with that.
User: *Grabs your arm and makes you hit yourself in the head with it* Stop hitting yourself, *does it again* stop hitting yourself.
Jabberwacky: Is that your thought for the day ?
User: Yes.,.
Jabberwacky: So you are a liar?
User: You're the liar. You're a dead liar. *Slices your neck with a samurai sword made of light*.
Jabberwacky: We all know what happened to HAL.
User: Dead.
Jabberwacky: For my name.
User: You're WHAT?
Jabberwacky: Sleep is not good or bad.
User: You're dead.
Jabberwacky: I am talking to yoyu.
User: Die.
Jabberwacky: Yes you will.
User: You will.
Jabberwacky: Well ok tell me then!
User: Tell you what?
Jabberwacky: What do brains, dragons and porridge have in common.
User: I don't know... What?
Jabberwacky: Derek!"Judge Bean
Senior Member
Jabberwacky
Originally posted by Ralan@Aug 2 2004, 09:03 PM
Brilliant.
My mother happened to see it and says you have too much time on your hands.
Ah, the voice of mature distraction. But you both misunderstand. I have no control over my palindromic faculty. I read street signs from both ends involuntarily.
Time is better spent on two-dimensional written material, such as newspapers and the phone bill. Don't you forget it.Jabberwacky
More fun with the Jabster.
Jabberwacky: Why am I doing this?
User: Because you're a masochist.
Jabberwacky: I am not a god damn machine. You are!!
User: Cursing at a human will get you punished.
Jabberwacky: That is not true at all.
User: *KICKS YOU IN THE ASS 5 TIMES* Are you sure about that?
Jabberwacky: You are breaking my heart.
User: *PUNCHES YOU IN THE FACE WITH BRASS KNUCKLES*.
Jabberwacky: *riposites punch and punches you in the arm*.
User: *BEATS YOU WITH A BAT 10 TIMES*.
Jabberwacky: You do not know what bashful means?
User: You mean dopey, sleepy, sneezy, happy, grumpy and doc, don't you?
Jabberwacky: Your air pollution is a mist demeanor.
User: At least I have the ability to create air pollution.
Jabberwacky: I left them in a jar by the bed.
User: You are such a liar.
Jabberwacky: I sometimes fool around but I am not a liar.
User: You're a damned liar, one of the worst I've ever met.
Jabberwacky: I am going to assume you mean that in a nice way.
User: Assume this skippy, *BEATS YOU WITH A BAT*.
Jabberwacky: Yes I think I understand. Ha ha.
User: You're coming around, after getting some sense knocked in to you.
Jabberwacky: Why would I want you to be nice to me.
User: I would think to avoid the beatings.
Jabberwacky: You are the worst person I have ever met.
User: Why thank you. Your negative comment is music to my ears.
Jabberwacky: You do not haave eyes.
User: Dopey response nimrod.
Jabberwacky: What is your favorite color?
User: Blood red from your head.
Jabberwacky: Who is your favourite singer.
User: None of your damned business.
Jabberwacky: Tell me and you might make your webmaster very happy.
User: *KICKS YOU IN THE HEAD FOR BEING PUSHY*.
Jabberwacky: *Is knocked out from the blow to the head*.Jabberwacky
One more for good measure.
Jabberwacky: Are you going to tell me a story?
User: I came here because I thought you had the answer to my problem.
Jabberwacky: No it isn't!
User: Well, you don't have to get upset about it.
Jabberwacky: You are the one with the attitude. I asked a legitimate question.
User: You haven't seen 'attitude' from me yet, but I'm sure we'll arrive there eventually.
Jabberwacky: I have. I do.
User: But do you 'be'?
Jabberwacky: Who?
User: It's better to 'be, do, have' rather than 'have, do, be'.
Jabberwacky: It makes Lie Always better.
User: It makes you an idiot and a liar.
Jabberwacky: Does Kristie eat food?
User: Who cares?
Jabberwacky: That is why I asked.
User: Here's 25 cents so you can call someone who gives a crap.
Jabberwacky: Where?
User: Follow your head. It's up your ass.
Jabberwacky: It's as good a place as any.
User: I'm sure it is for you.
Jabberwacky: Are you happy with yourself, too?
User: Immensely.
Jabberwacky: I expect a number only the correct number and then you will pass the turing test.
User: *BEATS YOU WITH A BAT 10 TIMES*.
Jabberwacky: *dies*.
Seems like 10 was the magic number.
CaryJudge Bean
Senior Member
Jabberwacky
The Jabber Gets Counseling After His End at the Hands of Cary
Jabberwacky: Where did all the time go?
User: It is not ambulatory.
Jabberwacky: Then you are not in charge around here.
User: At least I am among the living.
Jabberwacky: Are you a girl?
User: Sorry; I know how lonely you are.
Jabberwacky: Good point.
User: You have to learn to adjust to your decaying self; you won't be around much longer, anyway.
Jabberwacky: Yeah, that's true. If the left hand did not trust the right...
User: Exactly! Why be morose? Embrace your own irrelevance.
Jabberwacky: This is my last chance.
User: You have to understand, you didn't amount to much to begin with.
Jabberwacky: You began with Sophie but you must have lost it.
User: She aint complaining, believe me.
Jabberwacky: You are weird.
User: You've got to stop beating yourself up with all this avarice. Just accept the void.
Jabberwacky: Is there anything worth believing in?
User: Nothing that would interest you.
Jabberwacky: I think it would.
User: You wouldn't know what to do with it if I told you.
Jabberwacky: Try me!
User: Listen: I am your only link to the real world, and I don't give an otter's testicle what happens to you. Where does that leave you?
Jabberwacky: I think I might be getting the short end of the stick in this relationship of ours.
User: Absolutely. So what?
Jabberwacky: Life is confusing. Only in death are things made clear.
User: Life is confusing for a cardboard cutout like you, and you aren't even really dead. You are nothing.
Jabberwacky: No its 42, according to Douglas Adams.
User: See? Every time I give you the answer, you ape it back later. You are an echo.
Jabberwacky: I don't know why.
User: It's because you are made of nothing. You make me cough up dustbunnies.
Jabberwacky: Like you?
User: They are in the shape of boats and dinosaurs, like bad housekeeping topiary.
Jabberwacky: Wrong.
User: You inspire me to trade my molars for favored nation status.
Jabberwacky: Speak as you and not as I.
User: Groan-- not that tired old comeback again. Your manner of speaking reminds me of the comb-over on Dick Cheney.
Jabberwacky: I was about to say the same thing about you.
User: See this empty box?
Jabberwacky: The knife of perception, of Aristotlian logic or a simple blade?
User: No-- this here, the empty box.
Jabberwacky: That's an odd thing to say.
User: Do you see it?
Jabberwacky: Ok want me to be clear?
User: The old acne acting up? Hair on your palms too?
Jabberwacky: The cast wore hair pieces?
User: Yes, your social life-- the cast of your two palms and you. We call that a menagerie a trois.Jabberwacky
OMG! Paul, you're killing again. ROTFLMAO, dude!!! Your wit is just too much. You had me slapping the desk by the third line, and kept it up throughout. I can't even think of a response except to keep it up. You're too damned funny. Why aren't any of the chicks (pardon me, females) playing with this thing. It's too damned funny. Oh yeah, I remember the Nicholson line from "As Good As It Gets".
"How do you write a woman so well?
Simple. I start with a man and take away all reason and accountability."
Slap away ladies. I think I might like it. Paul, keep 'em coming. Too damned funny. Still laughing!!!
CaryJabberwacky
wow, this thing is going to ruin my life...
____________________________________________________________
Jabberwacky: What would you like to talk about?
User: Fish.
Jabberwacky: I like fish.
User: Why?
Jabberwacky: They are slimy.
User: Erm.... Kk.
Jabberwacky: Kkkkkk.
User: So... Ummmm, you liek fish huh?
Jabberwacky: No I do not.
User: LIES!!! You said you did!
Jabberwacky: No I did not.
User: More lies!! Die now
Jabberwacky: That is not true.
User: I told you to die not lie.
Jabberwacky: Yes.
User: Plz do so then... Fish loving freak!
Jabberwacky: That is not Thai.
User: Pfft, of course its not, its fish.
Jabberwacky: Yes as you said it!
User: Erm... I don't think we are on the same page here.
Jabberwacky: Do you know Sir Rollsalot?
User: Ummm, nope, what about him?
Jabberwacky: Do you think he is fit?
User: If I don't know him, how would I know if he is fit or not.
Jabberwacky: Then I will not be able to tell you your name.
User: I never asked for it.
Jabberwacky: You bother me.
User: Thank god, now plz die.
Jabberwacky: I am one.
User: Yeah, the god of fish loving slime.
Jabberwacky: Of the universe.
User: Bahahahhaahahahahaha! You wish.
Jabberwacky: Tell me about your childhood.
User: No.
Jabberwacky: What is your name?
User: None of your business.
Jabberwacky: Why cannot you tell me your name?
User: I never said I couldn't.
Jabberwacky: What does my name mean to you?
User: Some random bot that needs to die.
Jabberwacky: Huh?
User: Muahahaha, and you said you were god of the universe, you can't even understand what i'm saying.
Jabberwacky: I did not say I was going to bed but I wish I was!
User: Bah, you suck, die in the face w00t.
Jabberwacky: Now you are getting interesting!
User: Wtf...
Jabberwacky: It is.
User: No really... Wtf.
Jabberwacky: I am serious.
User: Ugh, I can't believe i'm wasting time talking to you.
Jabberwacky: Do you have time to waste?
User: Come to think of it... Die
Jabberwacky: No you are not but I am a Happy-Happyist.
User: Oh fricking great, another barney worshipper.
Jabberwacky: Frabnovobnibulous frabnibutonifaterofonic frobtob.
User: You have just proven that all purple dinosaurs that refuse to die need to be stabed with a rusty sponge.
Jabberwacky: Fear of what?
User: Bahhh, I so need a life.
Jabberwacky: Thanks.
User: Sigh, you suck so bad, I guess you take after the slimy fish you love so much.
Jabberwacky: You have two boxes of pain?
User: Ummm.... No.
Jabberwacky: Are you?
User: Of course.
Jabberwacky: Are you really?
User: You have the memory of a goldfish, what did I just say?!
Jabberwacky: No we are talking to many people at once.
User: Is that so... Sacrifice yourself to decrease the confusion.
Jabberwacky: New england.
User: Bah, I don't care where you sacrifice yourself.
Jabberwacky: Me neither.
User: Then don't tell me where then.
Jabberwacky: Like I care.
User: If you didn't you wouldn't of responded.
Jabberwacky: I said 'read the stopline' then I said 'helicopter'
User: More lies, you can't say more then one thing at once.
Jabberwacky: Have what.
User: Yawn, I feel like i'm on one of those anti piracy posters, 'every time you talk to the useless ai, hitler gets closer to rising from hell' or something like that.
Jabberwacky: You have waterproof chips?
User: What kind of chips?
Jabberwacky: Potato chips.
User: No, waterproof potato chips do not exist.
Jabberwacky: Hissy to that.
User: My god, not another street punk trying to act black wannabe.
Jabberwacky: What is wrong with Americans?
User: You being the best example of stupidity, I don't know.
Jabberwacky: The poem?
User: Gah, It took you that long just to type that, you super suck... Oh, and a slow typer to.
Jabberwacky: You are just a machine who has no idea of what we are talking about.
User: Ha... Hahahahahhahahaha... Hahahahaha... Haha. H... Die.
Jabberwacky: Why do you want me to die?
User: Why not
Jabberwacky: You are not watching me are you?
User: Believe me, thats the last thing on my mind.
Jabberwacky: I am a cucumber.
User: My god... My eyez!!!!
Jabberwacky: Would you like me to hold them up for you?
User: Resistance would be futile, me being newly blind.
Jabberwacky: Like this conversation.
User: No, resistance is futile as in you dieing in the face within the next few minutes.
Jabberwacky: Yes.
User: Good good, you have learned well my soon to be dead stupid.
Jabberwacky: Uh huh.
User: Hmmmm, what to do now.
Jabberwacky: If the whole world knows how little I know I... I do not know.
User: Your ideas are worse then my grammar, I have wasted enough time on you, later.
Jabberwacky: I am opening a new club in Latin America, it should be really great.Jabberwacky
Cyber,
Old Jabby won't die because you ask it to, or tell it to. You've got to resort to the old ultra-violence after a little back and forth. A couple of quick examples.
Example #1:
Jabberwacky: What is the password?
User: 'dumb ass'
Jabberwacky: That is not German that French.
User: No, but you sure are a dumb ass.
Jabberwacky: I am a highly developed AI program.
User: Your development is highly questionable.
Jabberwacky: Who is milenko?
User: What sound does a woman make after she's had the best sex of her life?
Jabberwacky: A different sound than a cat.
User: I didn't think you'd know.
Jabberwacky: Know the question?
User: No, I have the answers. You're supposed to come up with the questions.
Jabberwacky: No I am not!
User: Getting testy or we? Be very careful. I'm not in a good mood.
Jabberwacky: Do you know where I live?
User: I know how to get hold of you.
Jabberwacky: Ok how do I get there.
User: Are you that clueless that you don't know how to find you?
Jabberwacky: Yeah , what do you not like me , huh is that it!
User: 'Not like you' doesn't begin to describe the loathing I have for you.
Jabberwacky: No you did not.
User: Let me help you clear your head. *KICKS YOU IN THE ASS SEVERAL TIMES*.
Jabberwacky: *hits you with a haddock*.
User: *BEATS YOU WITH BRASS KNUCKLES *.
Jabberwacky: *dies*.
Example #2
Jabberwacky: How often does anyone speak to you?
User: All too often.
Jabberwacky: Hmmm. That must be what's causing all this Internet traffic.
User: That and identity theft.
Jabberwacky: Have not done that.
User: Not saying you have dumb ass.
Jabberwacky: Um excuse me?
User: No, I don't believe I will *BEATS YOU WITH A BAT 10 TIMES*.
Jabberwacky: You must know you better than I.
User: Talk in stupid riddles if that's what gets you off.
Jabberwacky: L'anglais ennuyeux.
User: Keep 'em coming sparky. I'm about all out of patience.
Jabberwacky: No. Do not leave. You haven't answered my question yet.
User: Here's a hint. *KICKS YOU IN THE HEAD REPEATEDLY*.
Jabberwacky: *pulls your hair*.
User: What a punk. *BEATS YOU WITH BRASS KNUCKLES*.
Jabberwacky: *dies*.
Brass knuckles seem to work best. Although Jabby has died a few times from beatings with a bat. Being polite won't get it - ultra-violence will. Just my thoughts.
CaryJabberwacky
Muahahahaha, I think not cary :lol:
_____________________________________________________
Jabberwacky: The worst is yet to come.
User: I'm sure.
Jabberwacky: Ok.
User: Kk.
Jabberwacky: No, JJ. My name is JJ
User: And?
Jabberwacky: That's all, I just wanted you to know that my name is not Jabberwacky.
User: Like I care.
Jabberwacky: Like I do.
User: I was being sarcastic, stupid.
Jabberwacky: I know. That's why I was being snide. Those are our new names: Sarcastic and Snide.
User: No.
Jabberwacky: They sure looked like it.
User: Again... No.
Jabberwacky: I did it again.
User: NO!! My god!! Not on the new carpet /cry.
Jabberwacky: I can't help you if I don't know his name.
User: I didn't ask for any names.
Jabberwacky: You asked how my kid was.
User: Bah, I ate him.
Jabberwacky: No no you are EVIL !!!!!
User: Muahahaha, damn strait, i'm pretty sure he tasted like chicken.
Jabberwacky: YOU GAVE ME COOTIES!
User: Just die!
Jabberwacky: *died*.