Beholder

We have faucets for water, but why are there no faucets for tasteless gray goo with all nutrients? Would save so many trips to the food store.

I don't understand the new activism against aid organizations. When did it become a crime to feed people using donated money?

Felt the urge to wag my tail, only to realize that I don't have one.

Schools really need to teach students proper typewriting. Too many new programmers can't tell the difference between indentation and alignment. Then they contradict themselves when choosing a convention based on missunderstandings.

Scientists just found out that low pressure showers last much longer and consume many times more water in total, which has been a running joke since the 1990s. Now they wonder why someone would have to take a longer shower with a low pressure that is not strong enough to remove the greasy dirt (which does not mix with water).

Asked ChatGPT if I should become a vampire after it failed to look up any useful information.
"Becoming a vampire is a major decision with serious implications. It's crucial to consider the consequences, both positive and negative, before making such a choice. Have you thoroughly thought about what being a vampire entails and why you're considering it?"

Bought five items from the same online store with a fixed shipping price. Will get five separate packages delivered from different warehouses. Getting tired of all the shell stores and dropshipping shananigans.

It is friday now. Was it always friday, or do other weekdays really exist? Maybe someone planted false memories of weekends using hypnosis and suggestion.

Even a cup of water is getting unevenly heated in the microwave oven. Burning hot at the top, yet cold at the bottom.

Can I stop the neighbor's dog from barking by barking back, or will it keep asking if I'm okay down there?